Thursday, July 18, 2013

Naruto Chapter 639 Review - Night of the Dead Dead

Written by: Shiggins

And so their attacks do fuck-all.

To start this week off, we saw the remains of Hashirama and Tobirama reform back, slowly. Tobirama then begins his counterattack against Obito, using a strategy he seemed to have created years and years ago for all Edo-Tensei zombies. Hashirama binds Obito using his wood-release jutsu as  Obito suddenly realises he is covered in those convenient explosive tags that have been in the entire series. To put it simply, tags keep multiplying and exploding, over and over again.

It's Like A Pretty Hug That Kills People
Of course, it doesn't work. Why would it? We've already seen Obito survive an attack like that, when going up against Konan and her canyon of boom. He only had the sharingan and still managed to escape that impossible deathtrap. So now, he's super strong with a monster inside him. Nothing is going to work.

And I Thought My Rape Face Was Scary...
Obito brings out his new technique. Black stuff. They keep flowing out of his hands and he throws them as shuriken towards everyone there. According to Hiruzen, who I've honestly been forgetting about recently amongst all these useful Hokage, this technique resembles Oonoki's jinton, but is a lot more advanced and can be used as attack and defence. So this black stuff is actually made of 4 different elements of nature. Probably fire, water, wind and earth.

Back at Naruto, Minato says he can't go over and help Hiruzen right now as Obito "kills" him. Sasuke then tells Naruto that it doesn't matter since the Hokages are already dead, hence putting them in front. Makes sense when you think about it but it's still a shame to know your old master and dad could be torn apart at any second.

It's True. Sasuke Is A Whiner.
As for Hashirama, he's decided to go Sage and help out by heroically saving the day. Sadly, Madara realises his body is unable to resist any longer and he decides to finally take on Hashirama. Personally, seeing Madara so obsessed with Hashirama is actually annoying me now as Madara used to be so cool and calm when he first appeared. Now, he's annoying and sounds like Naruto wanting to fight Sasuke all the time when they were kids. Once again, history repeats itself.

Ok now things get weird for me. Obito jumps through the air and surprises everyone, including hmself, by swelling like a big-ass balloon and landing on the ground with a crash. Minato comes to the conclusion that Obito still can't properly control the Juubi, which is a major stroke of luck right now as he's been annihilating everyone without even needing to properly control it. Minato decides to try using one of his techniques we haven't seen before, but Obito's upper-half suddenly appears below Gamakichi and Naruto, sending them flying. Obito's next attack is blocked by Sasuke's Susanoo.

The Resemblance Is Scary
Sasuke has a strange moment inside his head here. He sees the old photo of Team 7, and then Naruto's face gets cut out. Sasuke claims he will "delete the past". I knew Sasuke was a douche, but is he actually planning to kill Naruto only? He sliced Naruto's face out of the picture that seems to exist in his own head, which implies he wants to remove only Naruto from the old team. Like an ex-girlfriend cutting out all the faces in every picture of her boyfriend that just dumped her.

Never Forgive The Boy You Kissed Then Dumped.
The next moment, Obito grabs both Naruto and Sasuke. This leaves Minato praying that he'll make it in time before Obito crushes their heads with his amazing powers of freaky. And that's how the chapter ends.

So we've now got only Naruto, Minato and Sasuke fighting Obito right now. The others are either not allowed to take part of the fight, including Darui, or are still recovering from being taken down so easily. This chapter was mostly fighting, as most recent chapters have been over the past month or so. I don't even know what's going through Sasuke's head anymore and honestly, I'm not even sure I want to know. He's nuts. Plain and simple. All I know is, we can not trust that "man".

Manga Rating: 3/5

Character of the Week: Minato Namikaze for being the only Hokage not to have died against Obito in this chapter and for trying out a new technique.

Predictions: More rabid fighting. Sasuke is planning something big and it's probably going to involve taking over Obito's body so he can use the Eye of the Moon plan. Maybe he'll take it over like his master taught him: A tongue in the mouth.

P.S No, this isn't permanent. I just figured I'd review one or two chapters for a while until a Naruto reviewer is found. Hope you enjoy.

Darui Is Not Amused But I Hope You Are

Shiggins: . .
Shiggins enjoys all strange forms of communication, especially those including cosplayers saying hello to him. However, until that wonderful day comes, you can also contact him on his Skype; shigginsishere. He can also respond to you if you contact him through GMails at

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